4:31A.M

the next time i wake up i will be getting rdy back to camp. nvm, i shan't complain too much. Im booking out soon anyway.

last night i had a hard time falling aslp. Perhaps it was too early, but issues are running thru my mind. nah, it's no longer abt the bdae. i settled everything as i told myself. I then realised, im feeling insecure about the things around me. I started to question myself whether i was wad i am now in the past. I then noticed the change in me. I had become more unwilling to trust, more skeptical abt the friendships that i have. Past few incidents definitely created a change in me. I have forgiven all of them, but time to time it will just keep coming back to me.

it's hard to forget. really. but at least im moving on.

I was reading thru my previous posts when i said abt building a broken rls takes time and effort. Rebuilding this trust takes time n effort too. Does it make me wiser? im not too sure, but im not as keen as before. Sometimes, it's gd to have someone watching over you. But you will feel quite taxed when u always have to try to explain, and the answers u get are always the nonchalent ones.

it's built in the character, that i cannot change.

God, i wished u step in some time.
maybe i shld let him step in some time.

got to guard the heart. i hate to run on the threadmill.